Sleep Sharing
Feeding to Sleep?
Breastfeeding
Baby-Led Solids
Hypnosis for Birth

About Tribal Baby

Natural Infant Hygiene has been described as an art, as it is a subtle dance between baby and parent. It involves constantly learning together and responding to nuances in behaviour and reinforcing them to foster stronger non-verbal communication. 

The timing catches are easy to get, are regular times, such as when he wakes up and after feeds or at nappy changes. 

The cue is the "sss psss" sound that lets him know when to go. The position is also a cue, as is running water. Exhaling onto his head was a cue that developed later.

The signs are the largely involuntary expressions, movements and sounds he’d regularly make when he needed to go. The uncomfortably full bladder would initially prompt these signs. Later they would become signals.

The signals come later when the baby can indicate with a voluntary action that he needs to go, such as moving towards the toilet place, using sign language, and later, speech. Even at three months he occasionally signalled a need to go by looking at the bowl. From six months several times a day he'd crawl over to the pee-bowl to signal his needs. From 12 months he regularly used vocal signals.

Intuition is when you get the feeling baby needs to go, and they do! Slow for me to respond to well, comes with experience as a combination of timing and subconscious awareness of subtle behaviours I think! I call it the "Baby Radar" or say "My Potty Sense is Tingling" when I feel he needs to go.

"Prime Times for EC" records our experiences learning these aspects of EC.

Take advantage of timing!

'Timing' is a great way to start - you are assured of success, as littlies pee so frequently, and then you can use the cue sound as they go, which begins to reinforce the process for the baby. Take them on waking, after feeds and at nappy changes. Soon enough (in baby time) they start expecting you to take them, so they begin exhibiting clearer signs as they wait just that little bit of time they are able to. This time gets longer as they grow stronger. I use timing as an EC tool every day. Wake - pee. Finish feed -pee, car trip - pee break. 

Being an EC detective

Identifying signs is a detective process. It involves studying the baby for movements, noises and expressions they make before or during peeing. Having a list of possible signs was essential, as we'd look for a couple of them at a time - perhaps over a few days. Having an idea of his regular pees meant we could lay him in a warm place and watch for the sign before he peed, rather than trying to be 'on guard' all the time. Before he was mobile, as a tiny baby I'd have him laying in one of those rocker chairs with a nappy under his bum, so that I could watch for signs while I was making dinner. This was how I spotted him quickly kicking his legs as a sign, then caught the next few pees easily.

Identifying signs is like re-reading a book

Learning new signs is like when you re-read a book you enjoy, or watch a movie again and see bits you missed the first time - they were there, just not 'seen' with the first experience. With the nappy-free approach, though, new chapters keep getting added as the baby shows or develops new signs and changes or drops earlier ones.

Reinforcing signs

Once we became aware of, or 'find' one we'd take him for a pee-opp whenever we saw it. This reinforces it and his signs become clearer and stronger. For example, when I became aware of him suddenly kicking his legs if he was on his back and needed to pee, it was quite short, now it is more obvious, and he looks closely at my face as well, as he tries to tell me! When Maven was a month old we went on a camping holiday, and we had lots of time to observe and discuss Maven's signs: 
"Do you think that piggly wiggly was a sign?" 
"I think so, we'll look for it"
"Yes, it was! We've found another one, yeah!" 
We spent the week away with him in disposables, and it was our 'game' to keep them dry as long as possible. On that trip I perfected my use of the bowl in bed, and how to feed him laying down!

Signs baby needed to have a wee or poo.

- becoming aware of baby communicating by signs in the early stages

• He wouldn't stay attached during a feed - he pops on and off, fussing at the boob.

• He has a certain anxious squirm he does on my lap.

• He has increased muscle tension and twitches his legs -especially clear if he is on his back.

• He will twitch his head to the side and avoid eye contact.

• He has a quick frown that passes his expression

• He will get noisy, anxious sounds.

• In the sling he will begin twitching his legs up, squirming and may make little noises that become more urgent and frequent.

• In the baby backpack he brings his legs up and squirms, and we can feel it on our backs

Practising together: all three of us!

Now that we have a whole collection of signs we are aware of, regular 'timing' pees, and some signals from Maven, it is a matter of getting better at it together. It is not a one-sided process, as Maven gets better over time as well, and we improve every month. As his bladder gets bigger and stronger he pees less often and will sign earlier before he needs to go. I always know when Chris has taken Maven to the toilet as he calls out from somewhere "You're a genius, mate!"

An expanding awareness of signs

Over time there has been an expanding awareness of his signs, and increasing complexity of body language 'signs' to interpret. This makes it easier as time goes on. For instance, at night at first I responded if he was kicking me with his legs, the squirming was awaking me. Now, I find myself awake, and can listen just to his breathing to tell if he needs to go or not!

A lesson from our cats: the 'pee button'

For a while when Maven was three to four months old he'd pee really well if I tickled him over his bladder area. It was helpful at night and if he was having trouble relaxing. I used this technique many times, as it prompted a big relaxation of his bladder muscles, and he'd feel much better afterwards.  We called it his 'pee button'. I thought to try it after remembering when we had kittens we would watch the mother cat come in, roll the kit over and lick it's lower belly, the kitten would then do its business for her to 'clean up'. I thought, we're all mammals, surely it is an instinctual technique. I still do it occasionally as a cue, but it isn't really needed these days. Sometimes I still do it at night - sort of flick-grabbing at the skin, as if licking it, if that makes any sense? Does the trick.