Have You Discovered Your Elimination Communication Confidence?

Our Nappy Free Baby: Updates About Elimination Communication

Updates About Elimination Communication With Our Nappy Free Baby.

When our Baby was little, I was a regular visitor to the International Elimination Communication group, an online EC forum.

One of the things encouraged was to post updates about how your baby was going – it helped to focus your thoughts, encouraged you to go on through ‘damp’ stages and was very helpful to read as a Mum exploring Elimination Communication for the first time.

Here I share the updates I posted at various stages of our journey; I hope they might encourage you as well.

3 Month Elimination Communication Update

  • Age of your EC-child

DS 3 months old.

  • We started at… birth.
  • Generally speaking we are doing..

Enjoying ourselves

  • How do you know your baby has to go?

In-arms – squirming, kicking legs, pop on and off boob.

At night – squirm, restlessness, kicking.

Independent times – leg kicking, frowning glances.

  • Is there a difference for poos and pees?

Nope – happen at the same time. Poos happen mostly in the morning. DH holds him for his morning constitutional as they take a while, in about three waves, as I catch a fast relax in bed a few more minutes!

  • Which positions/receptacles do you use?

In-arms at the laundry basin a lot, wide bowl also. Other sinks as well. In arms when out.

  • Do you use nappies or training pants?

Cloth nappies with fleece elastic or nakey bum on waterproof mat sitting on a cloth nappy, or with flannel between his legs on my lap at home. Trying out one wet pants at times. Disposables on most outings, or cloth nappy with plastic velcro tab cover, and pee-breaks as possible.

  • How are you doing away from home?

Disposables mostly, with pee breaks when possible. Short walks in cloth nappy with velcro tab cover and frequent changes and pee breaks.

  • What are you doing at night?

Practicing with night time. He lays on a mat with a cloth nappy between his legs. He feeds every two hours, and I give a pee break then. Some catches each night, mostly. Some misses – I change the mat or the cloth depending on wetness, dropping it on a waterproof mat on the floor, and washing in the morning. He feeds and pees every two hours. I had some insomnia, and put him in a ‘pee bag’ over night for the first time since he was tiny – he’d wiggle and squirm until I held him in position in the bed to pee – he wanted to wait! He was in a pee bag at night on and off for a couple of weeks, sometimes all night, sometimes part of the night.

  • Who takes baby to the potty?

Me and Daddy.

  • Accidents – how many do you have and what times are especially accident-prone?

Mornings especially. Whenever he is active, heck, all the time! Keeping him dry, though, and many catches each day. About 5 misses when he first wakes! Doesn’t seem to be much of a regular pattern – sometimes 20 or 10 mins between pees, sometimes 40 minutes.

  • Other new insights:

His communication is amazing, if erratic.

  • What do you like most about ecing at the moment?

That we have some nights dry already. That I can sometimes tell when he needs to go. That I can tell when he needs to go when breastfeeding.

  • Do you ever wish you’d have never heard about it?

No. It is an exciting challenge. I love it.

 

6 Month Elimination Communication Update

  • Age of your EC-child

DS 6 months old.

  • We started at… birth.
  • Generally speaking we are doing..

Three parts to this answer:

1. in-arms – very well.

2. at night – good – a few misses per week.

3. on the floor – improving from dreadful!

  • How do you know your baby has to go?

In-arms – squiming, kicking legs, chi-pee warmth on hip, pop on and off boob.

At night – squirm, restlessness, little noises, pop on and off boob.

On the floor –  frown/eye contact, timing/intuition and restless behaviour, just starting to be sitting up & willy grabbing.

  • Is there a difference for poos and pees?

Poops happen early in morning, when he has his first pee for the day, and happen in the laundry basin over the ‘baby bidet’

  • Which positions/receptacles do you use?

In-arms at the laundry basin a lot, wide bowl also. Other sinks as well. In arms when out.

  • Do you use nappies or training pants?

Nakey butt at home, one wets during high miss times (meals, visitors, cold weather), disposables on certain outings, or onewet undies. He sits/lays on washable mats – waterproofing the environment rather than the baby!

  • How are you doing away from home?

Using one wet pants with parent room visits. Disposables at restaurants, visits to parents houses sometimes (still with pee breaks), movies.

  • What are you doing at night?

Nakey in bed, perhaps a t-shirt or singlet for warmth is all he needs. He sleeps with a flannel cloth nappy or a flannel between his legs so that it is easy to remove if he wets it, without disturbing him. It is also easier to give him a pee break this way. I hold him over the wide bowl when he kicks me awake. He sleeps on a fleece mat with a towel in the middle and plastic on the bottom, which protects the bed and makes it easy to move him around. We were having a stage of many misses at night, then I started drinking less in the evenings and feeding him preferably from one side in bed, and they evaporated to easy catches every 2-3 hours.

  • Who takes baby to the potty?

Me and Daddy.

  • Accidents – how many do you have and what times are especially accident-prone?

Mornings I miss several quick pees in a row on waking – he sits on a mat with a flannel between his legs. This is just starting to change as his bladder capacity is growing. He is beginning to crawl off the bed if he needs to go – a good sign. I have misses while he is independent on the floor – still quite a few depending on the day. He frowns before a pee, so I can watch for that. Many misses still on the floor times – he is on a washable crazy quilt, and I soak up misses with a cloth as well. I try to put him down after a pee, but it doesn’t make much difference yet. He seldom pees on me though, and is really good in a carrier and holding well when we go to the shops for walks.

  • Other new insights:

Mobility – starting to sit up has been the key to improving misses at floor time – I realised he’d sit up to pee.

  • What do you like most about ecing at the moment?

That he doesn’t wear nappies all the time like his contemporaries! Having him nappy free at night is really inspiring to me. Things are improving all the time.

  • Do you ever wish you’d have never heard about it?

No. It is challenging at times with frequent misses – but they are just accidents and will get less as he grows. They are easy to clean. No poopy misses for a long time.

 

9 Month Elimination Communication Update

  • Age of your EC-child

DS 9 months old today, 1st December.

  • We started at… birth.
  • Generally speaking we are doing..

Three parts to this answer:

1. in-arms – excellent.

2. at night – excellent.

3. on the floor – variable, on the poor side?

  • How do you know your baby has to go?

In-arms – squirming, kicking legs, chi-pee warmth on hip, pop on and off boob.

At night – squirm, restlessness, little noises, pop on and off boob.

On the floor – sitting up & pickle-grabbing, frown/eye contact, patting my leg, shouting, swinging arm at floor, saying ‘ttt’, timing/intuition and restless behaviour.

  • Is there a difference for poos and pees?

Poops happen early in morning, sign is anxious squirming, pop on and off boob frantically, noises. Teething poops are these signs, the farts and trying to get off lap during the day.

  • Which positions/receptacles do you use?

In-arms at the laundry basin a lot, wide bowl also, some standing in sink at pees when I know he is declining a real need, dabbling in potty use for timing pees now and then. In arms when out.

  • Do you use nappies or training pants?

Nakey butt at home, onewets high miss times (visitors, cold weather), undies sometimes (more for ‘christening’ them, really!) Nakey butt makes it easier to spot signs and to give timely pee-breaks and to clean up.

  • How are you doing away from home?

Excellent! Nakey butt on shopping trips (since 8 months) in ergo or sling. Onewets for outing visits, or if he will be on the floor. No nappies since 4 months, occasional plastic nappy at movie or parent visit! (He just refused to use the nappy at the movies, though – took him to sink!)

  • What are you doing at night?

Fully nakey in bed, just a t-shirt makes it easier to pick him up. No bed protection since 8 months! (I used a flannel between his legs again for about a week until I adapted past the hyper-vigilance that comes with a new stage/change)He pees into a wide bowl I hold in place with my legs – heaps of space to catch the stream. Apart from growth spurts and teething, he is recently (last month) peeing around 9pm, once at 3-4 am, then when he gets up around 6. SO easy.

  • Who takes baby to the potty?

Me and Daddy.

  • Accidents – how many do you have and what times are especially accident-prone?

WOAH mornings – busy times, when I am on the computer! If I have any caffeine or too much wheat products – pee fountains half a day later for about half a day. Teething = more pees. Tiredness = more misses. Nights – one last month due to hayfever and stuffy nose. In arms – two when learning signs in my new ERGO. On the floor – up to six a day, as few as three.

  • Other new insights:

I didn’t realise how much mobile babies HATE having their nappies changed, and how hard it is to do so until I see people do it. I thought putting on his undies was a squirm-fest! The role-reversal chi-pee at night is a new discovery for us that has been a fabulous eye-opener.

  • What do you like most about ecing at the moment?

The ease of a nappy-free baby. The naturalness of an EC baby. Having a nakey baby in bed is fabulous. Not using, carrying about, buying or changing nappies. Even mopping up a miss with a cloth is easy.

  • Do you ever wish you’d have never heard about it?

One answer is NO WAY! I love it, I am SO GLAD I heard of it before and started at birth. I’m helping him, us, the planet, our budget, others we introduce to EC or just give them an EC insight into their child’s behaviours. Another answer is – only when I spend a lot of time with nappied babies, – I feel a bit stupid going out to the toilet so often when they just get to sit about and change nappies whenever – until they change a nappy- then I see the TRIAL that is with a mobile baby covered in poop butt to back who screams and escapes the whole while. Then I feel great, and so relieved and happy for Maven. Sometimes when we have a pee-fountain event I fantasize about ignorant bliss and covering him in a nappy – but I just can’t!

12 month Elimination Communication Update

  • Age of your EC-child one year old on the first of March 2006
  • We started at… birth
  • Generally speaking we are doing… great!

In-arms – 100%

At night – 100%

Carseat – 100%

Out & about – 85-100% (depending on whether in-arms or independent on floor)

On the floor – 85% (0-4 puddles per day)

  • How do you know your baby has to go?

In-arms – chi-pee warmth on hip, squirming madly to get onto floor, grizzling, becoming hot & sweaty even! Swinging legs in Ergo, or sling, straining with limbs/body in sling.

At night – ragged breathing, wiggling, knees brought up & twitching feet/legs.

Out & about – as in-arms, on floor – mostly timing, facial expressions, hand movement observation.

Carseat – he cries out when in the car seat, will signal by sign occasionally (hard to see of course!)

On the floor – he’ll approach & grizzle at me or call out about twice each day. He’ll swing his arm near or grab at his twig & giggle berries, or even sign occasionally now (SO exciting), usually he’ll sit up really straight, too.

  • Is there a difference for poos & pees?

Poops are very regularly early morning again. I worked with him to achieve this again by lots of probiotics & early morning extra long nursing (ie as he was sleeping) so he was ready to go on waking! He’ll be flipping a lot in the bed when ‘brewing a poop’, have some toots. Often he’ll be a bit ‘resisty’ to get going, & I gently ‘bicycle’ his legs –only a tiny bit – & this helps him over the hump, & he’s good to go. He leans back heavily as I crunch my belly muscles to encourage him, & echo the sounds he makes, kissing his head, telling him he’s doing a great job. Also, massaging his belly clockwise gently these early mornings, & also the lower-back spine massage someone suggested (? thanks!) is helpful, too.

  • Which positions/receptacles do you use?

In-arms over sink in bathroom, kitchen for variety, bathtub, lately into toilet as I sit on the edge of the tub, feeling good about him enjoying that.

  • Do you use diapers or training pants?

Mainly nakeybutt (I find it WAY easier!), I have him in knickers (cotton undies) sometimes, too.

  • How are you doing away from home?

He wears knickers if going in the Ergo or sling, sometimes nakeybutt (depending on where I’ll be able to pee him), Onewets if he is going to have independent time. I’ve noticed he often doesn’t want to go in restrooms that are small (big parent rooms are OK). Taking him outside to a flowerbed helps him relax and pee, then he’s cool and bouncy again.

  • What are you doing at night?

Naked baby between us, no bed protection anymore (since 8 months) Occasional accident if he skips his 9pm tinkle. A few accidents when moving states. I used a mat for about a week in case.

  • Who takes baby to the potty?

Me, daddy.

  • Accidents – how many do you have & what times are especially accident-prone?

0-4 most days atm? We are in a 1-bedroom hotel room this month, so he is always very nearby (as opposed to just nearby!) All accidents occur on the floor – often they are SSP’s – ‘Surprise Standing Pees’. Some are in the morning, some late evening – I’m calling these non-sign/signal misses ‘tumble pees’ as they are pure accident – a tumble in the process for Maven, related to tiredness, busy-ness or excitement. (or me not being aware)

  • Other new insights:

His vocal signalling is progressing – perhaps once or twice per day I respond to this. He is becoming clearer in saying whether he needs to go or not – asking with sign language & words helps – he’ll look excited or have unconcern as a reaction if he needs to go. Still, I veto this on occasions I *know* he needs to pee, & employ my various ‘tools’ to help him relax & go.

He’s now calling out in bed sometimes when he needs to pee, and rolling onto his belly and sticking his bum in the air! He’ll also try to get off the bed if he needs to go (at awake times – not at night) Still having the ‘role reversal phenomenon’ where he’ll be wriggly if I need to go to the toilet – even after he has just gone.

  • What do you like most about ecing at the moment?

Nights – the naked baby in a dry bed, that we wake in the morning & I grab the bowl & he pees, back on the boob, then I grab the bowl & he does his daily poopsie woopsie & I flush it down the toilet – gone. The natural instinctive communication is just fabulous. I am so glad I kept at it all those early months when I missed pee after pee, but just believed in him & the process.

Travelling light – going out for a walk with baby in knickers on my back, knowing there will be no problems with this. We’ll just have a pit stop here and there at a bush or tree, and no-one will even ‘see’, even if I am in a mall surrounded by the walking masses!

  • Do you ever wish you’d have never heard about it?

No. I wish EVERYONE had heard of it so at least they have a choice over culturally ingrained ignorance and culturally reinforced ‘readiness’ crap. I think of those babies trying to communicate & being ignored in the nicest way – by a caring parent who knows not what they are trying to say – it is just not fair that people aren’t given information. ‘Babies cry for no reason’ is also a terrible statement. It becomes an excuse to ignore babies cries. It has very rarely occurred to me – if ever – sometimes I just can’t work it out, but find a way to help anyway! (play, pee or feed) I feel anger towards nappy commercialism & the effect that it has on babies & the earth, & people’s budgets – nappies are not cheap in any way. I know some say EC ‘keeps women down’ – I think it is the opposite – we concentrate on the baby in its early months, then our lives are made easier by not having the drudgery of nappies – even with a number of puddles in a day. It is so much easier to give baby a pee break.

13 Month Elimination Communication Update

13 months old on Saturday the 1st March.

  • We started at…

birth

  • Generally speaking we are doing…

Great! Although on balance we are having a lot of learning misses atm. (Squatting pees) We have also had two pee-fountain events, which have strangely helped him with his signalling (though I wouldn’t recommend it as a strategy! Our pee fountain events are related to wheat overload)

  • How do you know your baby has to go?

Various signs – pickle tugging is pretty clear, general behaviour change to fussy, grizzly, speedy, climbing off bed, lap, etc. Overt signals are things like approaching me and calling, making his ‘ghrrrr’ sound, (sometimes pshhh) tugging at his ear. It is SO exciting these are becoming more common now, after consistently practising them for him for months. Sometimes he’ll hit the toilet lid, bring me the bowl, that sort of thing. I feel like my intuition is also improving – but I do think that is a combination of timing and subtle sign awareness a lot of the time- for me.

  • Is there a difference for poos and pees?

Not really, hasn’t ever been. Just the farts and a certain increase in activity level prior to a poopsie. Being aware of his timing, and a strange ‘poop radar’ I have helps me. We’ve had some poop accidents related to timing changes – again I am working hard to keep the morning constitutional regularity – hanging out until its done! He helps a lot – eye contact, sort of whacking at his bum, yanking his pickle OFF, the usual signs in abundance.

  • Which positions/receptacles do you use?

In-arms classic position, various makeshift positions! We are doing daily ‘potty modelling’ since he turned about 1 – so he sees the behaviour at least once per day. No pressure for him though. He’ll watch, come over and pee with us, though he is still too little to get on the potty, so we don’t put him on it. I still hate the loud clunky potty.

  • Do you use diapers or training pants?

Nappies? What are those? One wet undies or knickers. Nakey bottom at home (easier to clean the floor than change his pants and perhaps piss him off with a miss) Plus easier to spot signs nakey after 6 mo. (when peeing frequency reduces somewhat)

  • How are you doing away from home?

Onewets for wandering, nakey in sling, or in knickers. We are experimenting with knicker use when out atm – I arrive somewhere with him in knickers, so long as he peed on arrival, I leave him in his knickers for a half hour, sometimes he’ll signal (in small groups of people). If he doesn’t have a pee, I then put his undies on and casually observe for signs and signals to give myself a break, changing quickly if a miss occurs. In big groups (playgroup) he is in undies(onewets) and usual observation, as just as often as he signals, he also pees in excitement/ distraction.

  • What are you doing at night?

Naked baby sleeps between us, rouses to dream feed, sleep-pee at 9pm and 4.30am atm. We had a phase of frequent peeing on moving into new home, then down to 3 pees overnight, back to 2 again now. He feeds more than he pees – I wondered if that would EVER happen, 6 months ago – It DOES!

  • Who takes baby to the toilet?

Me, dh

  • Accidents – how many do you have and what times are especially accident-prone?

Not really anymore – used to be mornings, perhaps late afternoons when he is more tired? Usually related to my level of distraction or if we’re having a pee-fountain event. Atm, gee, 4-8 a day? (sounds a lot, but many are squmble pees or a few drops later finished in bowl) Thank goodness for flannels!

  • Other new insights:

-Sign language (in return) has ramped up this month. Understanding of places and things also. I say ‘toilet?” he gets up and charges to the room. Sometimes this is because he needed to pee, other times showing his skills.

  • I’ve noticed his overt signalling is more common in the mornings.
  • On the signing, at first he overtly signs, but not to ME – he signs to himself or perhaps to the universe – if I miss it, he may pee. A subtle distinction and stage of the game.
  • We have the ‘squatting tumble pee’ now – he is learning to squat, and out pours the pee. I’d thought this would take 6-8 weeks to improve, but already (2 weeks) he’ll go ‘ghrrrr’, a few drops come out and then he’ll have a pee in his bowl/ sink or the loo. He’ll squat, go ‘ghrr’ and look at me to help him. If I miss this, the next time he says “ghrrr”, he pees a bit, or perhaps all of it, depending.
  • Another interesting development is that he will for example squat, have a tumble pee while we are eating dinner on the lounge, then he’ll go and get a flannel, and drop it on the spot on the rug! Or he’ll help to wipe it on the floor if there is a cloth nearby. (Now I leave one here and there) The other interesting thing about this is that I tend to verbally ignore misses, beyond saying ‘pss sss’ if I see them happening, even to wiping them when he isn’t looking, yet he is still imitating. SO cool – the “behaviour sponge” stage is truly upon us!
  • What do you like most about ecing at the moment?

The ease, the normality of it. Nights of course with a soft baby.

  • Do you ever wish you’d have never heard about it?

Of course not!

  • A tip for this age/stage?

– Reinforcing and offering MANY ways for baby to communicate their need to wee. Maven does many of them, experimenting, he has many to remember / try out at different times as he practises communicating with us. When he adopted HOT as his ‘sign de jour’ he used it for everything. I’ll see him se several of them at once, that is a pretty good indication. Atm is the ‘ghrrr’ signal – every elicitation of that gets him a pee break and appropriate other choices for sounds. It is fun, but exasperating at times if he does it each time he squats!

14 Month Elimination Communication Update

DS 14 months old on Monday the 1st May

* We started at…

Birth

* Generally speaking we are doing…

Awesome-fabulous! A nappy-free baby is a breeeeeeeeeeze.

* How do you know your baby has to go?

Various signs – pickle tugging is pretty clear, plucking at underwear, frown, stopping activity getting up and looking around. Overt signals are things like approaching me and calling, making his ‘ghrrrr’ sound, (sometimes pshhh and now ‘sss’) tugging at his ear/hair, bringing over his pee bowl or brining in the potty (yet doesn’t even use it yet! My intuition is also really good now – or maybe he just goes easily every time I happen to offer – in any event ‘dry runs’, ‘test runs’ or ‘magic pees’ (thanks Bernadette!) are very, very few now – once a day perhaps rather than several times perhaps. The interesting thing about signals (overt) is that he will sign once ‘to the universe’, now he may signal overtly twice, but I’ll almost always catch it. Even if I think I hear it, off we go, and whammo! I am guiding DH in what to listen for with the vocal calls at the moment, as he isn’t hearing them as well yet. “Did you hear that sound? That was it” (or one of them)

* Is there a difference for poos and pees?

The only new insight to add here is that I *think* that massaging his calf muscles as I hold him in arms for a poo either helps him to relax to go, or somehow helps him to go. Poos actually smell now that he is eating something every day (fancy that?) As he has a morning pattern of 5.30 whoopsies, I put it beside the bed as I attempt to boob him off for a bit longer snooze so I can go on-line (occasionally works!) Gee, fhew! I almost gag at the thought of him SITTING in that, being forced to do it in his pants! I’ve found that allowing him/ helping him to stretch out one or the other leg, sort of twisting himself, then the slight bicycling, really helps him to get it started or out now that things are ‘chunkier’. I keep a little cloth UNDER my pillow so I know there is something ready to wipe his toosh without having to grope in the drawer one-handed in the dark. (Oi!)

* Which positions/receptacles do you use?

In-arms classic position, various makeshift positions! “potty modelling” is still occurring. Having head-scratching over how to ‘show’ (model) how to get onto the potty for him.

* Do you use nappies or training pants?

Since he turned 14 months, he has ONLY been in knickers so far. (or the usual nakey bum)

* How are you doing away from home?

He’s been nakey butt or in knickers in-arms since about 6-7 months, but into Onewets when we arrive somewhere that he has independent ‘floor’ time, as he’d either pee with excitement endlessly or not pee for hours in excitement, and I couldn’t tell which it would be! I’ve been using knickers more and more – practicing for short ‘floor’ times recently – as usual, at first this is a ‘brain strainer’ as I watch like a hawk for signs so there are no accidents when out, then the next stage is to realise that, well, he was staying dry in his Onewets more and more at these times, we could do it. I often use the ‘birthday’ each month for a new goal, or to move into a new comfort zone, and it is a great strategy. This week we went to a NEW playgroup in knickers for over two hours, then an ABA meeting for over 2 hours, all fine. I am SOOO excited – floor communication is always the ‘hit or miss’ time for us, now it is coming together! I am certain all the nakey bum time at home has been the key for us – I can watch for signs, reinforce the cue on misses, he gets the feedback etc.

* What are you doing at night?

Naked baby sleeps between us, rouses to dream feed, sleep-pee at 9pm, 2pm and 5.30am atm. He went 9 hours between pees the other night, so may be approaching the overnight pattern again. I am so excited about this, yet it would be bizarre to the “Is he sleeping through the night?” crowd, as I am more excited about him not peeing overnight, despite the fact that he feeds 3-4 hourly. What would the phrase be? It can’t be “he’s dry through the night”, as he has been more or less since 3-4 months with my help, but ‘holding’ it all night? Hmm…

* Who takes baby to the toilet?

Me, daddy.

* Accidents – how many do you have and what times are especially accident-prone?

0-2 a day, related to my distraction (computer) or similar. Last month the much higher rate turned out to be related to a pineapple reaction: (here’s what I wrote on my web-page)

The Peril of Pineapple – Baby’s reaction to pineapple – not good

* Other new insights:

‘Misses’ are self-cleaning! Maven goes and gets the flannel to wipe up any misses. He even cleaned up a poop accident when having some teething troubles for a few days. WOW. He wipes up any water he finds on the floor, or on things. I have in my mind from the ‘continuum concept’ how chn can be helping out more than being helped by four, and I can definitely see that happening! He helps dress/undress, puts his clothes away, hands me clothes to hang on the line, (all at a ‘baby’ level of attention and frequency of course), but wow.

* What do you like most about ecing at the moment?

My life involves taking the baby to places with a pair of knickers in my pocket that I never actually need. This is normal. Nappies are NOT!

* Do you ever wish you’d have never heard about it?

Of course not! I bring it up if I get the chance. Like many of you, I see everywhere babies reacting to the food from cans and jars being fed to them, and signs of elimination needs being mis-interpreted everywhere. THE major one being breast fussing being interpreted as either a sign of low supply or a ‘self weaning’ sign no matter the age -gagh! I only hope I can help change that for some people at least…sigh.

* A tip for this age/stage?

Responding to the first overt signal, even if the baby seems to be doing it absently or ‘on the move’. The stage is definitely still (for us) ‘mum in charge’, but beginning the ‘baby-in-charge’ starting with his overt signalling at the moment, currently him more frequently getting the bowl, going to the bathroom when I ask “toilet?” or “Lets go to the toilet” on seeing a sign or signal. Looking forward now to moving towards beginning independent using of a toilet place….whenever!

Charndra

Ds Maven 14 months

15 Month Elimination Communication Update

 

DS 15 months old on Thursday the 1st June

* We started at…

Birth

* Generally speaking we are doing…

Spectacular, loving this process and the daily fun of it, wondering what amazing new thing he will do!

* How do you know your baby has to go?

Various signs – pickle tugging is pretty clear, plucking at underwear, frown, stopping activity getting up and looking around. Overt signals are things like approaching me and calling or crying out, making his ‘ghrrrr’ sound, pointing at the toilet place,  tugging at his ear/hair, bringing over his pee bowl. My intuition is also really good still – I just know when he needs to go – I’ll start thinking about taking him to the loo, and subconsciously begin observing for signs. He is now signing twice sometimes – for instance he’ll go ‘grrr’ as walking around, then he’ll come close and grab at his pants or willy or belly.

* Is there a difference for poos and pees?

He is signalling well for poops at odd times – once he clearly pointed over to the sink and did a big poop at an unusual time. He’ll signal even to do a fluff! Otherwise, they are in the mornings while still in bed. he’ll squirm, fuss, refuse the breast, pluck at his belly, lift his legs, grizzle and go “grrr” until I help him to go in his bowl. It is really obvious when he needs to go then. He likes to look at his production afterwards, go to the bathroom and lift the toilet lid for me as I pour it down, then closes the lid and tries to climb on the loo to flush! (I help him to do this)

* Which positions/receptacles do you use?

In-arms classic position, various makeshift positions. I have a potty bowl (lappy) that he has used a few times now – so easy! Over his wide bowl, the toilet, kitchen sink (Yes, still, it is so easy!) bathroom sink, outside.

* Do you use nappies or training pants?

No. he is in knickers or just pants when out, spilt crotch pants when at home as it is getting colder (from the EC Store) and some I made. I went out today with him in the woolen split croth pants with knickers over the top – people said he looked like a super hero in tights!

* How are you doing away from home?

Knickers and pants or just pants – Dh reminded me he didn’t really need to wear knickers yet. I thought they might keep more of a flood in, but the two accidents he has had while out were only partial – he then finished in the loo, and nothing went on the floor. He wears socks also, as they can catch any overflow. He has been really upset about accidents, it feels so terrible to him in pants, different to trainers where he would grizzle for a bit, then ignore the wetness if I didn’t realise when we were out.

* What are you doing at night?

Naked baby sleeps between us, rouses to dream feed, sleep-pee at 9pm, 2pm and 5.30am atm. We’ve had a couple of accidents at night,  – I think it is his pattern shifting, and me not yet catching up. Again, only partial accidents, he squirms and grizzles until I help him pee, then put down a cloth nappy on it and back to sleep.

* Who takes baby to the toilet?

Me, dh, grandma twice!!!!!!

* Accidents – how many do you have and what times are especially accident-prone?

0-2 a day, related to my distraction or similar. Sometimes in the bathroom (who cares) Sometimes I just forget timing and pssssss – oops. He always helps to clean it up – I give him a flannel and he starts rubbing!

* Other new insights:

– Maven has awoken me at night by vocally signalling “Grrr” when he needed to pee and I was still dreaming.

– Maven has been putting bits of loo paper into the toilet. He got some, wiped himself then put it in the toilet – imitation is an amazing thing.

– After talking more to my Grandma about how she did a similar thing with her children I am left scratching my head about how in one generation the skills were not only stopped, but forgotten with the advent of disposables and ‘readiness’ psychology.

– He is showing the occasional preference to use the toilet (in arms). I’ll say “Toilet, Maven?” at a sign or signal, and point to his bowl, but he’ll head for the bathroom and hit or lift the toilet lid, so we go there! Perhaps once per day.

* What do you like most about ec’ing at the moment?

How simple and natural it is to help him to go to the toilet through the day. How amazing that we go out with him in mere pants and there is no problem with this. A few accidents here and there are so what? No extra washing or shopping – how on earth can people afford nappies for years? I feel sorry for the poor Mums thinking they have to use nappies full time for 3 or 4 years. Imagine that? Such unnecessary drudgery!  Poor children having to mess themselvesintentionally day after day for years. (rather than accidentally; quite a different thing)

* Do you ever wish you’d have never heard about it?

No.

* A tip for this age/stage?

I stay responsible for keeping baby dry; although regular overt signalling happens daily. I can’t rely on him to alert me; when he does it is great; otherwise I am still aware through timing/intuition of his needs. Keep open to new signals and signs and developing preferences to support; I am seeing these all the time!

Charndra

Ds Maven 15 months

16 Month Elimination Communication Update

DS 16 months old on Thursday the 1st July

* We started at…

Birth

* Generally speaking we are doing…

Pretty well!

* How do you know your baby has to go?

A lot of timing/intuition this month. Subtle behavioural signs, which these days seem really obvious a lot of the time.

* Is there a difference for poos and pees?

Poos happen in morning. He flaps in bed, scratches at his hips, belly.

* Which positions/receptacles do you use?

In arms over bowl, sinks, potty. Some sitting supported on potty. (holding his legs)

* Do you use nappies or training pants?

Neither – pants mostly, sometimes knickers and pants. Socks, too. Split crotch pants, some nakey butt after a miss – but it is so cold here!

* How are you doing away from home?

Pants, wearing socks in case of a miss. (They soak any flow, he will only have a part accident, and actually none since last month anyway.) Sometimes knickers if I think he might have an accident – to help catch flow.

* What are you doing at night?

– same, baby in top and perhaps socks. I have the thin bed mat under the sheet as we had a short spate of night part misses, not sure why – only know that once we put the mat under, no more accidents!

* Who takes baby to the toilet?

– me and dad.

* Accidents – how many do you have and what times are especially accident-prone?

– 0-4 a day. Mostly no misses or one or two. Often in the morning in a burst, or late in the arvo or evening, almost always in a cluster. Usually related to his tiredness. Or, me being on the computer!

– accidents are only EVER at independent times (have been for about 10 months now)

* Other new insights:

-He has stopped his vocal call for the moment most of the time, he is teething madly – 5-6 teeth at the moment, ouch! Yet we are still doing pretty well – quite surprising to me, really. DH and I have intuitive moments at the same time! It is amazing to me how the intuition has become really good, when I was so ‘huh’ and confused about it early on.

-He is learning to sit on the potty as fun more frequently – not peeing there independently yet, getting closer! he still brings it in to me, or goes and gets it if I ask him if he wants to go sometimes. Other times he’ll head to the loo or the sink.

* What do you like most about ec’ing at the moment?

– how easy and normal it is – part of our lifestyle. Toddlers don’t need nappies – so what if there is the odd puddle? He makes far more mess with all the rest of his stuff – blocks everywhere, sand all over…

* Do you ever wish you’d have never heard about it?

No.

* A tip for this age/stage?

Keep trusting baby will develop new signs, will try out new ways of communicating their needs.

Charndra

Ds Maven 16 months

17 Month Elimination Communication Update

DS 17 months old on the 1st August

* We started at…

Birth

* Generally speaking we are doing…

Pretty well! A very odd month.

* How do you know your baby has to go?

A lot of timing/intuition this month, again. In an ‘overt signal’ plateau phase – he has dropped his vocal signal ‘grrrr’ this month. He is signalling with signs – pulling his ear  Subtle behavioural signs such as agitation, racing, irritation / squawking even crying have been signals responded to positively. He waits for wee breaks really well – does massive wees.

* Is there a difference for poos and pees?

He flaps in bed, scratches at his hips, belly for poos – usually goes in the morning. He got the trots after having antibiotics for his first cold. Yet he had excellent control, let me know by patting his bum, subtle signs. One instance we went to the museum, Maven in regular pants, had lunch, I took him to the loo, where he had a massive runny bum, I wiped, asked if he’d finished, he shook his head! He had another runny bum , I wiped again, asked if he’d finished, he pointed at the loo, went again. Then indicated he was finished by no reaction. It was the first time he had been so clear, and the first time he had done a poo out of the house that I can remember. (since he was a tiny baby that is)

* Which positions/receptacles do you use?

In arms over bowl, sinks, toilet, potty. Some sitting supported on potty. (holding his legs)

* Do you use nappies or training pants?

Neither – pants mostly, sometimes knickers and pants. Socks, too. Split crotch pants, some nakey butt after a miss – but mostly pants in the cold.

* How are you doing away from home?

Pants, wearing socks in case of a miss. (They soak any flow, he will only have a part accident, and actually none since last month anyway.) Sometimes knickers if I think he might have an accident – to help catch flow.

* What are you doing at night?

– same, baby in top and perhaps socks. I have the thin bed mat under the sheet as we had a short spate of night part misses. I also had a flannel between his legs in case of a miss for a while. A few night misses – in retrospect I think related to teething, tiredness, possibly wheat overload. I’ve noticed I can have some now and he isn’t effected during the day, but may have accidents at night instead. I have cut right back again and we are ok. Also related to my having the same gastro and being stuffed with waking hourly for that, then two hourly for the recovery phase. He had his first ever poo accident in bed – straight into my hand! I was cuddling him, waiting for the next spew, when I heard the sound! Poor thing. We were surprised how easily we cleaned up at 2am – much easier than I thought really. Thank god for the boobs – he recovered so fast.

* Who takes baby to the toilet?

– me and dad.

* Accidents – how many do you have and what times are especially accident-prone?

– 0-3 a day. Mostly one or two. Random in timing, he often cried immediately after.

* Other new insights:

– Maven used the potty totally independently! I was typing on the computer, and he did a dollop on the tiles, and was pointing to it as I turned around, making noises. I popped him on the potty, and he did a wee with me holding his legs, then got up (I wiped his bum) Then I was cleaning up the dollop, only to turn around to see him in the next room sitting and ‘working’ on the potty! He got up to show me a little ‘Mr Whippy’. I was so excited I nearly took a photo! I wonder if the previous day of going to the toilet every half hour or so myself had something to do with it, as he always accompanies me and I tell him I’m going “toilet” with his cue sounds etc. I was certainly surprised that his first independent activity would be a poo. Since then he is the same as usual – sits on the potty, tries to go then goes in-arms later.

– His use of the ‘finished’ sign (we do rubbing hands together for this sign) is excellent and really helpful – he does it really often when he is done – in bed after his morning woopsie, after a wee – I can ask him if he’s finished, and he’ll sign when he is.

* What do you like most about ec’ing at the moment?

– It is simply so easy to do this in the day – I simply find myself holding him for a wee sometimes – amazing, and don’t find it an imposition on my day – it is part of the usual pattern.

* Do you ever wish you’d have never heard about it?

No.

* A tip for this age/stage?

Accept the process is cruising along – baby keeps displaying amazing self awareness at odd times. Plateaus are part of the process, mean nothing at all.

Charndra

Ds Maven 17 months

19 Month Elimination Communication Update

DS 19 months old on the 1st October.

This is our latest month update.

* We started at…

Birth

* Generally speaking we are doing…

Great – new things occurring.

* How do you know your baby has to go?

signs: behavioural – grabbing at pants, willy, trying to pull down pants, pulling off socks, agitation/ sudden increase in activity, noise level increase – squawking or grizzling, inadvertent sign language.

signals: saying ‘wee wee’, saying ‘toyee’ looking for potty, sitting on potty himself, very clear sign language, coming to me and climbing into my lap, flipping himself around to the ‘position’, getting up and then flopping into my lap repeatedly. Saying ‘wee wee’ can be before – to tell me he needs to go, or after, saying he has done ‘wee wee’ and needs new pants. Another ‘signal’ is him walking past with a flannel in his hand to clean up a wee!

intuition: sudden burning need to take him to the toilet. Busting to go to the toilet myself, ‘suddenly’.

* Is there a difference for poos and pees?

For poos this month he is definitely going at varied times. Some in the morning, often a day in between. No accidents, though – I always ‘happen’ to be available, and he just takes advantage of opportunities to go.  I realised I have spotted a certain ‘piggly wiggly’ look that means he will poo. Often I feel by his muscles as I hold him in arms a lot of the time.

* Which positions/receptacles do you use?

In arms over bowl at night, sinks, toilet, potty, in nature. Some sitting supported on potty. (holding his legs) Independent wees in potty. Used a seat reducer at library loo for first time – at his choice!

* Do you use nappies or training pants?

Neither – pants mostly, sometimes knickers and pants. (when out) Socks, too. Split crotch pants, plenty of nakey time in spring weather at home. I leave him in pants when we come home – often this is really good for him – he’ll signal quite obviously in pants.

* How are you doing away from home?

Pants, wearing socks in case of a miss. No accidents for AGES! Want to make some slim line pants – he looks so cute in them with a little tush.

* What are you doing at night?

– same, baby in top, nakey bum. He wees around 9pm, going once or twice overnight between 3-5 am, occasionally 12 or 2 am.

* Who takes baby to the toilet?

– me and dad.

* Accidents – how many do you have and what times are especially accident-prone?

– 0-3 a day. Mostly one or two. Completely random, often in a cluster of days – ie no misses for a week, then four in one day, two the next sort of thing.

* Other new insights:

-Phase 2 Grad while out at 18 months

If Phase 1 is “Staying dry pretty reliably with mum’s help” that is Maven at home. He signals in some way pretty well, so some of the time he is a phase two grad at home. Generally pretty dry, occasional accidents I am unfussed over – part of the process.

When out is the fascinating thing! He will use sign language really clearly, he will take my hand and point, pull me to the toilet, he will head for it and bang on any intervening door, tugging at his ear and going “wee wee” or “toiyeee” and pointing. He will see signs for toilets and carry on about it. I discovered he could read the word ‘toilet’ when at a hardware store and he agitated until I saw the sign and took him – to a toilet we had never been to, after seeing a sign with ‘toilet’ tacked onto a pole with an arrow.

This has all become really evident in the last few weeks. It is amazing! However, the funny bit is that this happens a lot! He seems to like going to the toilets in other’s houses – he signals to go frequently, though he always squeezes out a wee – even if TWO drops! I know it is a phase that’ll pass, but it is funny to take him three times in a short space of time or he gets upset (plus I don’t want to second-guess and have wet pants to change!)

If Phase 2 is “Signalling rather consistently, needing occasional reminders”, well Maven is there. I need to change it to: “Signalling rather conscientiously, consistently reminding Mum” He never ceases to astound me.

* What do you like most about ec’ing at the moment?

– Running out of reasons. It is easy? I’d rather wipe the odd wee up than nappy full time.

* Do you ever wish you’d have never heard about it?

No.

* A tip for this age/stage?

Expect ‘glimmers’ of brilliant communication between plateaus of little overt signalling. One minute Maven does a ‘gymnastic pee’ on a chair, the next he is saying ‘wee wee’ and climbing onto the potty in the other room, then bringing it to the toilet. Another time he’ll squat and do a surprise wee, then another time he’ll wander around whinging and crying until I take him to the toilet.

Charndra

Ds Maven 19 months

20 Month Elimination Communication Update

DS 20 months old on the 1st November.

This is our latest month update.

* We started at…

Birth

* Generally speaking we are doing…

Cruising along.

* How do you know your baby has to go?

signs: behavioural – grabbing at pants, willy, trying to pull down pants, pulling off socks, agitation/ sudden increase in activity, noise level increase – squawking or grizzling, inadvertent sign language.

signals: saying ‘wee wee’, sitting on potty himself, very clear sign language, coming to me and climbing into my lap, flipping himself around to the ‘position’, getting up and then flopping into my lap repeatedly. Taking my hand and saying ‘wee wee’. Taking my hand and doing the ‘poo’ sign, pointing at the potty. Arranging the potty, getting a cushion, putting it down and pointing for me to sit on it and keep him company!

intuition: ‘chi pee’, sudden burning need to take him to the toilet. Busting to go to the toilet myself, ‘suddenly’. He is very obviously signalling to me when we are out that I need to go to the toilet – taking me there, opening and shutting the door, pointing to the toilet. This is when I DO need to go, but am more interested in yapping.

* Is there a difference for poos and pees?

For poos this month he is definitely going at varied times. He does the poo signal clearly – hitting thigh with his fist. He is using the potty independently for poos – to the extend of taking it and emptying it himself in the toilet! He does like our presence, though – enjoys us sitting alongside for moral support I guess! Funnily, if Dad is home, he wants Dad to empty the potty, takes it to him ONLY with pride, pointing to the bathroom.

* Which positions/receptacles do you use?

In arms over bowl at night, sinks, toilet, potty, in nature. Independent wees in potty. Independent poos in potty always (except if we are in bed when he needs to go first thing – we use the bowl then)

* Do you use nappies or training pants?

Neither – pants mostly, sometimes knickers and pants. (when out) Socks, too. Split crotch pants, plenty of nakey time in spring weather at home. I leave him in pants when we come home – often this is really good for him – he’ll signal quite obviously in pants. Used One Wets twice when out as I hurt by back and knew I wouldn’t be focussing clearly, or lifting well. They got wet, he let me know asap. At home for those couple of days there were a few puddles – it seemed to throw him off kilter as well that I wasn’t acting normally, though he still did use the pot pot at clear times.

* How are you doing away from home?

Pants, wearing socks in case of a miss. See above.

* What are you doing at night?

– same, baby in top, nakey bum. This month sleeps between feeds moved out to 8 even 9 hours, no wee breaks. Awesome. Weeing around 8 then around 6. Then had a night of endless weeing and feeding as I did a food challenge and found he wasn’t ready as I had wondered! Put mats back down for a couple of nights, as usual, once I did that, no problem catching them. Pattern returning to new normal of little overnight weeing. So nice.

* Who takes baby to the toilet?

– me and dad.

* Accidents – how many do you have and what times are especially accident-prone?

– 0-3 a day. Mostly one or two. Completely random, often in a cluster of days – ie no misses for a week, then four in one day, two the next sort of thing. Hasn’t changed from last month – we seem to be in a plateau, though he is always improving – more independent wees. Must admit to be cruising myself, happy with current situation, know it will change again towards 2.

* Other new insights:

– Entering more into “Phase Three” behaviour – taking himself independently to the pot pot. Not all the time, in bursts – like he’ll go several times in the morning on the pot, then have an accident or two (seemingly with no awareness), then just when I am thinking ‘huh?’ he says “wee wee” goes and gets the potty, sits down, wees, picks it up saying ‘wee wee’, takes it to the bathroom with me and lifts the lid as I pour it down and he then climbs on and flushes the loo. I expect he’ll just do this more and more often.

– I fell asleep on the lounge one day only to wake with him saying “wee wee” and showing me a potty to empty for him. I woke up fast as there is nothing worse than a spilt potty – unnecessary clean up!

* What do you like most about ec’ing at the moment?

– Easy.

* Do you ever wish you’d have never heard about it?

No.

* A tip for this age/stage?

Expect ‘glimmers’ of brilliant communication between plateaus of little overt signalling -same as last month.

Charndra

Ds Maven 20 months

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