Have You Discovered Your Elimination Communication Confidence?

Secret # 6 to Elimination Communication

Secret # 6 to Elimination Communication: Keep Your Expectations Realistic

In this secret you will discover how developing a realistic expectation of where your baby is ‘at’ in the process will help you feel at ease when you practice EC part time.

“Success generally depends upon knowing how long it takes to succeed.”
Charles de Montesquieu

Parents can become overwhelmed when feeling as if their baby is not doing as it ‘should’ be, or shows a new ability to communicate but is very haphazard about displaying it again – is baby regressing? Are you doing something wrong? This variable progress is actually very normal – natural toilet learning is gradual, so this is to be expected.

Trust the process – young children will strive to model the behaviour around them as they mature and become capable, so they will naturally want to do what the rest of the family is doing. Constant change is normal for babies in all that they are – you already know that – EC learning is no different. Expecting baby to be ‘toilet independent’ or signalling consistently and clearly by arbitrary ages is a sure fire way to become overwhelmed, disheartened and even get EC burnout -you don’t want that.

Keep three key points in mind:

1. Expect baby to be irregular about signalling, patchy over their body control and awareness until they reach consistent toilet independence – and even then they will have the odd mishap. You will still be amazed by the ongoing glimpses of remarkable communication they share with you.

2. There will be wet nappies, or wet pants right the way through until they take over themselves – our role is to simply help them stay dry by offering toileting opportunities or changing them promptly, and helping them learn about their bodies and how to communicate with us. It is a dynamic, imperfect process for sure. Do EC for your baby, not to ‘train’ early, not because of diapers – just to help your baby, and your relationship with your baby – as EC will help you to feel more connected to your baby, which makes parenting easier.

3. They are simply on a learning journey. Thinking of new skills popping up now and again as a glimpse into what will be common in the future is a useful way of seeing this progression – rather than that baby is forgetting or regressing. Although EC’d children generally develop toilet independence earlier than their fully nappied counterparts, this is NOT the goal – the communication is the goal, the connection.

So if you ‘expect’ the process to take over two years, you will not be disappointed. Meanwhile you will avoid a heap of nappies, save a fortune and enjoy daily rewards of positive connection with your baby – wonderful.

So, remember Secret #6 to developing your nappy-free confidence: Keep Your Expectations Realistic.

Adventures in Part-Time Pottying…

Reading about the experiences of a range of other parents doing EC part-time really helps keep a realistic feel of what stage others are at, and realising that there is a range of normal – babies are all individuals, (as are families) – and they all get there in the end. Reading about how EC is practised in other societies and in other times also helps build your understanding.

Discover more here: Adventures in Part-Time Pottying… Read about the adventures and experiences of families who have and are practicing EC. See the wide range of regular people no longer doing 100% diapers.

Easing Into EC Tip # 6: Listen to your baby’s sounds and breathing…

Your baby’s breathing rate and audibility, as well as the sounds they make, can be a clear sign of the imminence of their need to go. You’ll become more aware to listen carefully for increased breathing rate or volume as they wee in their diaper or on a mat during nappy free time. Breathing in a relaxed way yourself also helps them relax to go – as they will mimic as well as respond to your body cues.

So, listen to your baby as they breathe in your quiet times together and wonder what those baby sounds might be telling you.

Have fun connecting,

P.S. My baby went through many stages of increased accidents in his learning cycle – the trick is to support your own sense of comfort as well as supporting baby’s learning. For instance, on outings we ALWAYS used some form of protection whenever he was ‘independent’ – crawling or walking – until he was around 14 months – as he began vocally signalling and was more communicative about his needs when out by that stage. He had a few wet pants, sometimes we used EC pants (training pants) on visits if I felt we needed to, being flexible. He wasn’t independent at this age, we cooperatively kept him clean and dry. Nevertheless – he was diaper free.

The elimination communication alternatives, like ‘OneWet Pants’, ‘Shi Shi Nix’, and ‘EcaPants’ become a more practical option. Whenever you reach this stage, nappies are more of a hassle to use – especially as your toddler wants to keep moving.

Nappy-weaning… is gradual with elimination communication too.

Be reassured there is a ‘cross-over’ stage where you are practicing transitioning out of diapers into alternatives that still offer you peace of mind, but without the drawbacks of nappies. That’s why parents are offering them for purchase from their online shops.

My directory of Elimination Communication Stores

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Thank you,



Discover the 7 Secrets to Elimination Communication FREE eBook

Build Your EC Confidence With Ease! Download my FREE eBook:
Discover the 7 Secrets to Elimination Communication

The 7 Secrets are the introductory section of my eBook:

‘Part Time EC: A Personal Guide to Developing Your Elimination Communication Confidence’


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